Birthday Reflections
“Life really does begin at 40. Up until then, you are just doing research.” - Carl Jung
Today, I turn 41.
And while I’m not one for public birthday celebrations—aside from the epic Bandon Dunes trip with the boys for my 40th—birthdays have always been more introspective for me. They're a time for reflection, dreaming, and taking stock.
To me, birthdays feel like Mondays (yes, I know I’m weird—I LOVE Mondays). They mark a new beginning, a fresh start. Except now, I get to start with a little more wisdom and a lot more clarity. It feels like I’ve prepared my whole life to be 41, now I get to see what I’m made of.
One year ago, the night before my 40th, I was filled with anxiety—borderline panic. I wondered if I’d done enough. If I’d wasted too much time. If I was where I was “supposed” to be.
I couldn’t even tell you what “supposed to be” meant—but I was sure I wasn’t there.
Maybe it was the “Over the Hill” party my dad threw for himself at 40, or some story I picked up along the way that said it all goes downhill after this.
But I can say this with certainty: that night was the last time I ever thought that way.
This past year has been the most transformative of my life. I’ve grown more, learned more, and let go of more than I ever have before. So today, on my 41st birthday, here are a few lessons I’ve learned since “life really began”.
Age really is just a number
At 41, I’m in the best shape of my life. I ache less. I play more. I sleep better. I work smarter, dream bigger, and have more energy than I’ve had in years. I’m not “over the hill”— I’m finally seeing the view.
Put Your Own Oxygen Mask On First
This year, I made myself a priority. I cleaned up my diet, I start most days at the gym, I’ve cut out sugar, processed food, and even alcohol. I go to bed early, I wake up early. I meditate. I take walks. I play golf for my mental health. A few years ago, this life might’ve sounded boring—but I’ve never felt better. And because I take care of myself, I have so much more to give.
Less is More
I’ve been on a mission to simplify. Fewer commitments. Less stuff. Less stress. In our house, the motto is: “If it’s not a F$%& yes, it’s a no.” When I protect my time and energy, I have more to offer the people and things that truly matter.
Don’t Believe Everything You Think
We lie to ourselves all the time. I’ve learned that just because I think something doesn’t mean I have to believe it. I can’t always control the thoughts that pop up, but I can choose how much airtime they get. This year, I’ve started trusting my gut more—and my inner monologue less.
Don’t Just Step Off the Hamster Wheel… Blow It Up
This is MY life. There’s no “right” way to do it. Just because something has always been done a certain way doesn’t mean it’s for me. I’m done following other people’s playbooks. I’m writing my own rules, chasing my own definition of success, and building a life that feels like mine.
Be Here Now
And the biggest thing I’ve learned this year is “presence”. The past is gone. The future is unknown. All we truly have is this moment. And I’m learning to live in it. To stop spinning out about what’s next, and start showing up for what’s right in front of me. Anxiety steals from the present. I’m done letting it. Peace lives in the now—and I’m all in on it.
So here’s to today. To living more fully. To always learning and always growing. To celebrating every moment of this wild, beautiful life we get to live!
Cheers to feeling like I’m just getting started!
—Stu
